A Couple of the Shower Pictures

I finally got around to loading some recent pictures on my computer. I never use my real camera anymore, all of my pictures are from my IPhone. It's so much easier than carrying around my heavy camera!

The only down side is me having to plug in my phone to sync it with the computer each time I want to load pictures (which I guess is not the biggest deal in the world) but I was used to just popping out my memory card and sticking it in the laptop before.

In early October I helped host my sisters baby shower. I wish I could tell you I took a lot of pictures, but I took like two-literally. I just have this weird complex that if I take tons of pictures, it will be like "bragging". I just have to find the perfect balance of showing my friends/family the work I put in with lots of pictures, and bombarding them with a gazillion pictures of every little thing I did/made at the party. It's a work in progress guys! I was raised always being told "don't brag, never brag" so yeah I guess I have 'humble' issues, lol

Pumpkins: Since it was Fall, I thought it would be cute to having pumpkins at the shower. I researched online and saw these cute baby pumpkins. I painted the eyes and poked a hole and popped a binky in for the mouth. I put a ribbon on the girl and a hat on the boy.

Half of the cupcakes. This was my biggest regret: I took NO pictures of the shower cupcakes (these were my prototypes made earlier) I made Apple Cupcakes (below) and Chocolate Mint Cupcakes (sadly not pictured) The only change I made to the apple cupcakes was I used cinnamon to sprinkle the top instead of the sanding sugar. I think it looked simpler, and gave the guests a hint on what the cupcakes tasted like. The chocolate cupcakes had a peppermint buttercream that I tinted a really cool lime green. I sprinkled chopped Andies mints on those.

The favors: I was looking for a sweet, yet classy trinket to thank all the guests for coming to Elissas shower. I was getting discouraged at all the baby favors Michaels had to offer. I saw these beautiful jars in the wedding favors section. They were a bit pricey, so I decided to go home and wait for a 40% off coupon. At the checkout, the girl asked if my email is registered. I said no and she said would you like to register today and get a 50% off one item coupon? I said yes and ran back to the bridal section to pick up these jars-half off, yes!! I filled them with Fall M&M's and tied a olive green ribbon around it.

My (almost) finished diaper cake. I still had to straighten the ribbon and add some finishing touches to the flowers. I rolled up the diapers and used Giannas little rubberbands to keep them closed. Then I used a super big rubber band to keep all the rows of diapers together. I covered the rubber band with ribbon and placed green flowers around the cake. Her colors were green and brown, so I kept the cake simple, and used different shades of the colors.

I know my mom took pictures, so maybe I can see if I can load more later.

Lesson learned: take more pictures.

Blah

I've been feeling a little under the weather lately. I seemed to acquire an allergy to cats. Well, I was always a little allergic, but just a few hives here or there. Now if I'm around cats I feel horrible! Runny nose, sneezing, and eyes so itchy I'd like to just pop them out and soak them!

Then I found Claritin. My eyes no longer itched, and I could now pet a cat without the misery that followed. Of course I adopted a cat after my wonderful antihistamine discovery!

Anyway, there is the rare occasion that my meds fail. It doesn't help that my parents have seven, yes seven cats! Staying over there one night had me thinking I was dying! I couldn't breathe. I probably should have went in to the immediate care for a breathing treatment, but I just sat up in a chair all night watching a marathon of Dog the Bounty Hunter:

yeah.........

So the next morning I was still feeling winded, so I tried to take it easy. Lots of chicken soup, vapor rub, and R&R! Of course, having all this rest gave me lots of time to Google things. I googled asthma. After reading symptoms that sounded like mine, I read on. My eyes widened more and more until I read your lips eventually turn blue and you die. Ahhh! I had to be seen by a doctor!

I had Mark take me to the urgent care, where I had my lungs checked. They said I was fine- go figure. So, here I am still coughing. That's been my past week.

I'm very curious if anyone still follows me anymore. I was a bad blogger, and we all know what happens to bad bloggers: people tire of checking your blog just to see the same outdated post. Then they never come back.

Poof.Gone. :crickets chirping:

Fin

Lets see if this works......

Here is a video of Gianna. If it looks weird, it's probably my fault. I have no idea what I'm doing. I hope you can watch this!

Back to Blogging

4 months is a long time to disappear from here. That's a third of a year! Anyway, I'm guilty of letting my blog gather dust. I keep promising I'll be on here more, but always break my promise (just like dieting!)

I'd be a stater of the obvious if I tell you a lot has happened since I've been on here last- duh. So I won't.

My sister Elissa is pregnant, and due in about a month! I helped throw her a shower, and that kept me pretty busy. It was a success! I'll try to post some pictures of the decorations:

Actually, never mind. I forgot I didn't load those on the computer yet..sorry! I will post them soon! :)

Oh, I got an iPhone! I couldn't be happier! It is basically the greatest thing. I have a lot of fun with that gadget.

Mark is now a college student (again)! He is going for his masters in accounting. He studies a lot, so we are adjusting to that change in our family.

Speaking of change....we adopted a kitten! Her name is Katie and she is so cute! I really will post a picture this time: First a picture of G at about 17 months! Aww! :)

There you have it. I really will try to get on here more often!

Pictures of Gianna

It's been so long since I've blogged, I forgotten how. It's been almost a half hour, and I still can't figure out how to move the pictures in the right order. If anyone can enlighten me, I'd be much obliged! :)

Gianna is now walking! She started just one week shy of her first birthday. She is a pro!

As you can see Gianna had a clown for her first birthday. Surprisingly, she was not afraid of Pickles. Even more surprising, neither was I!

She is now 14 months. Time seems to be flying by. Gianna's little personality is shining through. I can easily tell she will not have a quiet disposition, like her mother. I was told I was the best baby on earth. My mom would say she could take me anywhere, and I would never make trouble. I assumed Gianna would be the same. Well she is a good girl, don't get me wrong. But she has a certain sparkle in her eyes...

As you can see, she love making strange faces, that makes everyone laugh. A future comedienne, perhaps? Another cute thing she does is shudder. Whenever she tastes something she doesn't like or sees something that frightens her, she gets the chills! It's very cute!

Well there you go! Again, if anyone can remind me how to manage my photos, that would be great!

Exploding Car Windows and a Sick Baby

We had a pretty interesting week to say the least. It started with a bang-literally!

G and I were driving to Elissa's house to visit. It was a non-eventful trip. Gianna always falls asleep shortly after we get in the car. Words cannot describe how grateful I am that she does that.

We were literally a minute away and I heard this loud thud. It sounded like someone threw a huge snowball at the back of the car. I looked in the rear view mirror and saw lots of glittery sparkles. For a second I assumed it was snow. Then reality sunk in- there was no one around to throw snow, let alone enough snow to make such a loud thud.

After looking again I realised. The window exploded. I was now 30 seconds away from Elissa's house, but it was one of the scariest 30 seconds of my life.

I was thinking what made the window explode? Was it a bullet? Then I got really scared! I've heard stories of kids being shot by a stray bullet in the car, and parent not even realising it because they thought they were asleep. Of course G was sound asleep! I reached back and was trying to wake her, but she was very sleepy.

I pulled in to Lissa's driveway and jumped out. Gianna was fine! She was still sleeping, like nothing happened. I inspected the window and all I heard was crackling. It was the window slowly breaking into a million pieces. I was still really shaken. What caused that?

After getting G in (and yes, stripping her from head to toe, just to make sure she was 100% ok), I called the police to file a report. After coming and checking out the car, the officer concluded that he had no idea why the window exploded (there were no cars around and he said it was not a bullet).

In a way I was relieved, but I was also still freaked out. Why do all the weird one in a million things happen to me??

Later that evening G started acting fussy. Her nose was really runny, so I assumed it was a cold. The next day she acquired a cough. So she has her first bad cold. She is taking it pretty well, I just feel so bad for her. We have gone through a lot of tissues, but G would much rather wipe her nose on my arm. I guess because it's much softer.

Addition to My Worry List

I came across this while checking the news on the web. I was totally shocked! How could this have passed under my radar? All this time I've been staying at hotels, unprotected from this type of invasion!

If any of you know a scaredy cat, consider me a scaredy cougar (no, not that kind of cougar.....never mind)! I'm just a big scaredy cat. I never cease to amaze my husband with my wild imagination on how everyone is out to get us.

We went to the zoo last fall, and we had to leave the stroller out of the primate room. Mark left his cup of water in the stroller. After we watched all the fun chimp shenanigans. we proceeded to put Gianna back in the stroller and move on. Mark went to drink his water, and I nearly passed out! "You can't drink that!" I said crazily. "Why?" he asked. "Someone could have spit in it or put poison in it!" Mark said he had never thought of that stuff until he met me. Not sure if that was a compliment or not, but he threw out the drink.

When I am at home with G during the day, and the doorbell is to ring, I jump. Not with curiosity or excitement, but with fear. I carefully, reealllly carefully peek out the window to see who it is. No matter who it is, I don't open it. Better safe than dead, right?

I wish I wasn't like this, but I am. Does that mean I think all people are bad? Mark asked me that once. After a moment of contemplation, I told him no. I think 90% of the world is really harmless. I just have to look out for that 10%, and you can never be too safe. I do watch America's Most Wanted!

Maybe next Lenten season, I will give up fear. And just to check up on me, pay me a surprise visit......

Now You See Me...

Where have I been?

I've been around, just not around here!

I'm greeted by the dust bunnies. They are saying "yay! Vicki is back! Does that mean we have to leave?" Their excitement turns to sadness.

"Yes, for now." I say as kindly as I can. "But you will be back! You see, I don't blog much. Soon I will leave here and not come back for a long time."

Now the bunnies seem confused. "If you don't come here, why did you create this place?"

Ok, Back to reality. G is sleeping at the moment, gently stirring. She's been asleep for awhile, which is a luxury for me. G naps twice a day, but the first nap usually lasts only a half hour. She sits straight up and cries slightly. Her hair is disheveled, and her eyes have not yet adjusted to being open.

Gianna has finally begun to crawl! It was a glorious moment. She has just been content sitting on the floor, playing with her toys. But one day, she got on all fours and Olia! G Mobile! :)

Here are some pictures of G lately:

Here she is with Jack, all smiles!

G got so very excited, she gave Jack a good slap on his back side! Babies should learn at an early age they should never slap or poke an animal, no matter how kind and gentile they are (like good old Jack!) So I told her "No". This is the face she makes when I tell her no!

Here is G pushing her stroller, sans her baby. She loves babies- real and fake! She gets a big cheesy grin on her face and squeals with delight.

I'm learning every day more and more about her mannerisms and temperament. Here is what I have so far:

Gianna is a little shy with those she doesn't see often. Not horribly shy, where she can't be held by anyone but me, but just a little cautious.

Once, warmed up, Gianna is a big cuddle bug! She loves putting her head on your shoulder and shyly smile.

Gianna is a party animal and a thrill seeker! She screams at the top of her lungs when she is excited. It is so cute (except when we are in Mass)! Her uncles' Nick and Vince spin her around and she just loves it!

Although G has a wild side, she tries her hardest to stay out of trouble. Once I tell her "no touch", she usually won't go near it again. So yeah, that makes me a happy mom!

Alright, G just woke up, so I'm off to tend to her!

Checkerboard Cookies

Since we were a little iced in on Christmas Eve, I was busy making the usual Christmas cookies. Upon finishing, and still having loads of time on my hand, I ventured online, and went to the joy of baking website.

I have never tried to make checkerboard cookies, and figured this would be the perfect time. You can find the recipe here. The only changes I made were omitting the hazelnuts and orange zest. No, I don't think that I made the recipe boring, just more classic! (I'm not the biggest fan of nuts in cookies anyway)

After printing the recipe, I admit I had to read the instructions at least 5 times- and I was still left unsure. So, I slowed it down and did it step by step. It took about an hour from start to finish. The end result looked great! This is the kind of cookie that will take you twice as long to make the first time, but then will be a breeze the next time around.

Here is the final product!

They tasted great too! The cookies were crisp and the chocolate taste didn't overpower the subtle vanilla undertones. The verdict: Yum!

Hand me down dreams

Growing up, I always thought it would be fun if I could be a figure skater. Watching the skaters elegantly glide and swirl on the ice made my eyes twinkle. I would hope I could skate like that one day. I was a slightly chubby girl who was about as flexible as a pencil with big dreams. I lost some of my baby fat but I am still about as flexible as a pencil (as far I know I am the only girl in the world who has never been able to do a cartwheel).

Is it wrong of me to hope G will have the same twinkle in her eye? Maybe if I sign her up for lessons when she's young....I never took professional lessons (but don't feel bad for me, I had much rather sit in a laundry basket watching Rainbow Brite)

It would be nice to be in the stands and watch spectators Oooh and Ahhh at G gracefully moving on the ice. I would proudly say 'that's my daughter!' Maybe she could even go on to the Olympics!

I'll take things one at a time- she has to learn to walk before she learns to skate.

A mom can dream, can't she?

What did they do to you?!

I have been meaning to put G's birth story up for the longest time. I have finally put aside the time and mustered up some patience to set my story free on the internet for all to read. I put up a couple of pictures of my battle scars. (next to 'hematoma, catheter and PICC Line) I made them a link in case you didn't want to see them! It is a little long- here it is:

My pregnancy was complication free. I was healthy as a horse, perfect blood pressure, no Gestational Diabetes, no strep b. Gianna was healthy as well!

The first mistake I made was staying with an OB I didn't trust. I still kick myself for that.She was cold and unfriendly, and not a huge fan of natural childbirth. I figured since my mom had homebirths and I was taking Bradley classes, I was safe. I knew what I was doing and would labor at home. Then, all she'd do was deliver my baby and I'd never see her again.

WRONG!

I went in to the hosp. April 5th at 11:30. The two L&D nurses were young and cocky. They forced me to lie on my back and not move. (with the most horrible back labor in the world!)
The fetal heart rate monitor they had me on broke. They laughed and said that has never happened before. So they unplugged it, wheeled it away and brought in a new one. So I had to lie still for another 30 minutes (which felt like 30 hours) all over. The nurses stayed grim and unfriendly the whole time, not really filling me in on anything. The whole situation was surreal. I felt more (much more) pain then I thought I would, and the nurses were snootier than I thought they would be. Family Matters was on in the background and if I saw Steve Urkel knock down one more thing.....his antics usually humor me-but not today. :)

After an hour or two, they called in my doctor, who decided that I "needed" an emergency c-section the first 5 minutes she saw me. What really angers me is I watch baby story, and read other stories on baby's heart rate decelling, and the dr's and nurses try EVERYTHING to get the baby's HR up (laying on the side, giving mom oxygen) It's like she gave up on me and my baby before she gave us a chance.

She said G wouldn't make it if I delivered vaginally (I was 5cm at the time without any drugs or pitocin) My husband and I were scared and shocked. But I feared for my baby's life, and bravely said yes to the section (after all I've seen millions of sections on TV, and they all go well, right?)

My mom always told me if I ever had to go into surgery, become friends with the anesthesiologist. Maybe if they connect with you on a more personal level, they will try extra hard not to kill you. She was from some African country, and spoke with a heavy accent. She noticed I was wearing a scapular, and called it a Rosary.

She gave me my spinal (which scared me to death before today) And I felt nothing overcome me from the waist down. I stayed emotionally numb to the surgery. I felt if I didn't think they were cutting me open, it wasn't happening. It went really fast, and just like that, Gianna was here at exactly 3:00 AM! I heard her healthy cry and it was just unreal. I remember saying that is a baby boy cry. Mark said no, it's a girl! Boy was I happy! (Not that I wouldn't love a boy)

I thought the section went great! I felt no pain, no pulling. I was very groggy, so I didn't get to enjoy G, like I imagined I would. I remember thinking her one eye was swollen, but that's about it. I told Mark to follow our baby, while they put me back together. I was then wheeled into a "recovery room" where they monitored me for an hour.

Then the problems started. In the recovery room, I started violently vomiting. RNs said that was normal. I continued to vomit for the next few hours-again they said normal.

I had many guests, but could not enjoy their company. I was so very tired. I never had a baby or surgery, so I thought that was all normal.

That night I was feeling weaker and weaker. They said it was just from the surgery. My catheter was still in, but my urine was light brown and barely existent. Again RN's not too concerned. Then at 3:00 AM the next morning (ironic, I know) one RN ordered a stat blood draw. That draw determined my blood level was at a 5! I immediately needed 3 transfusions. I was so scared. My doctor came in and said I was bleeding internally, and they may need to go back in if the transfusions didn't work. I called my mom at 4 in the morning, and she and my dad drove right back to the hospital. Mark stayed by my side, held my hand and prayed the rosary.
I remember telling the nurse "this is serious, isn't it." She just nodded.

So after the transfusions and blood work, they determined that my blood was stabilizing at a 9. In the meantime I was running a fever (before the transfusions), had HIGH BP, and my HR was in the 150's. I also had a HUGE hematoma on my abdomen (which the dr's and nurses said was normal as well!) They discharged me despite the fact my vitals were so poor.

When I got home I was delirious. My face was so hot and I could feel my heart racing inside of me. I just thought that was normal, because if the drs thought I was sick, they wouldn't discharge me-right? The next two nights (April 9th and 10th) were the worst nights of my life. I had to sleep elevated on my couch because I couldn't lie prostrate. I kept waking up every 10 minutes, when it felt like hours. My heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest and felt so hot. I had a small fan on me and a cold washcloth on my forehead (which turned warm really fast). I thought I would die that night.

The next day I told my Mark I need to go by my mom's (he was going back to work right after Easter, and I didn't want to be home alone with G.) When my mom saw me, she took my temp and I was 103 degrees! We called my OB, and she said "see how you feel tomorrow, and if you still have this fever call back." I told that to my mom, and she talked to the dr. She said "my daughter is so sick, and you won't give her antibiotics? She has a fever, it must be an infection" The dr. finally gave me a prescription for a antibiotic.

My mom took me to her doctor that week. He looked at me and said "What did they do to you?!" I needed a CT scan because my abdomen was still swollen, and that big bruise on my abdomen was burning hot and hard.

The CT scan showed I had three abscesses (two the size of softballs) I had over two liters of infected blood in my gut! I was immediately admitted. My vitals were so poor, the ER doc said I wouldn't make it through surgery to remove the infection. So I had a wonderful team of interventional radiologists remove over 1 liter of the blood. They were so nice. The said they would give me this pain killer that would make me feel like I drank too many margaritas. They used an ultrasound to find the abscesses and they put in a catheter (in my abdomen) and the blood continued to drain. My bloodwork was so bad. My white blood count was very high, as were my platelets. Which made my mom sick with worry over a blot clot forming. I had to have Heparin shots in my stomach every day to prevent clotting.

While I was in the second hospital, I had an OB I never met before come into my room while me and the fam were watching Father of the Bride say he looked over my charts and thinks I may be infertile due to my infection. He was very matter of fact about it. He said my fallopian tubes could very well be damaged after all the infection raged in my body. After he left I cried. My family all agreed to the fact he was a jerk and didn't know what he was talking about. I feel confident I am ok, but time will tell.

Long story short (sort of short): I almost died twice, had two hospital stays, 3 CT scans, a PICC line for 6 weeks so I could get IV antibiotics, 2 chest x-rays, 2 catheter procedures and lots of heartaches. The infection killed my appetite, so I lost 40 lbs in less than a month. I would cry everyday. I couldn't hear of my friends having natural, complication free births. I felt cheated of the birth I wanted and Gianna deserved.

We were so blessed that Gianna was a healthy baby. I would sacrifice myself for her in an instant. I am so very glad I was the one who suffered and not her. With that said I still felt bad when people heard my story and all they say is "wow, that's too bad. At least the baby is healthy" What about me?! I felt selfish because I was upset I was so sick. I tried my best to offer all my sufferings up, but I admit it was hard. Very very hard. I wondered why I had to be the one in a million case and not someone else. Was that wrong of me?

I lived with my parents for two months till I could literally get back on my feet. Everything was still getting back to normal for me. My bloodwork had to be normalized for me to go home. Thank God it finally did the first week of June!

So there you have it. If you are still reading this thus far; thank you. I feel so much healthier and all I have left of this ordeal is a faint bruise on my abdomen (that is still a bit tender) and jaded memories. I know everything happens for a reason, and God works in mysterious ways. Time will tell why I had to go through this.

This being a new year (and decade) I vowed to leave behind all the bitterness I had towards the hospital I had G at. It is hard because they were obviously negligent. All I can do is hold my precious Gianna tight, and tell her I would do this all over again for her.

Diet Time

It's that dreaded word: diet. I have been putting this off for a few months now. Seeing this is a new year, why not start fresh. I hope to lose 15-20lbs in 3 simple steps:

1. Cut all sweetened drinks from my diet. This will be the hardest by far. I love pop, kool-aid, just about anything with refined sugar or high fructose corn syrup.

2. Incorporate more lean protein (i.e. chicken, fish) and veggies into my diet. This will be easy.

3. exercise, exercise, exercise!

I admit I am a little afraid to start exercising again. I haven't worked out since before Gianna was born.

Having a c-section and nearly bleeding to death makes me afraid that doing too much will tear something in me and cause a slow leak. I will go on with my life growing weaker and weaker, totally unaware that I am bleeding to death. Then one night I will go to sleep and never wake up. The cause of my death: internal bleeding due to excessive exercise. My family will be consoled by the doctors saying this almost never happens.

So in that case I'd much rather stay nicely padded with fat and gleefully eat cookies and mashed potatoes all day long. Seeing that has has made my tight jeans even tighter and my face a tad rounder, I have to put my far out fears aside and venture to workout. I am even a little excited. Before I got married I enrolled in boot camp at my gym. It was intense but so amazing. I lost a lot of weight, gained muscle mass and even put a nice little curve in my ever so flat derriere! :) (which I thought was impossible BTW)

Okay! Here I go. Day 1 of my diet has been good so far. When Mark gets home I will bundle up and go for a nice brisk walk. Wish me luck

Happy New Year!

Okay, I haven't been blogging much lately. I really have no excuse. I could say I was busy, but that is a lame reason. Anyway, it's a new year and I will start fresh! My resolution will be to post at least twice a week. We'll see..... :)